I don’t know about you but I’m still reeling from the Full Moon on the 1st. Astrologers said it was supposed to bring up old wounds and boy did it. Did you feel it? I like to think of myself as spiritually “with it” but I have to say, I didn’t see that coming. You see I had something bottled inside me for a very long time and on Sunday it just came out, refusing to be inside any longer. And when it did, I actually felt my heart chakra “pop.” I couldn’t believe the physical reaction I had. Something freed itself from my chest. It was remarkable. We are all being forced to face old trauma, much of which we thought we dealt with already. I now realize we must expect the unexpected even now, late into this tranformational year of 2020.
So on with the topic at hand: jealousy. For the past month or so, I couldn’t understand why my instagram account was making me so miserable. All it is is pretty pictures. Or so it seems. But at every turn, there was an ad for something to make me better or my business better or to start doing something I’m currently not doing but MUST! to grow my business, sell more books, etc. It was so subtle I missed it. The mind game of many if not all of social media platforms: COMPARISON. The never-ending scroll of pretty pictures and targeted ads had me feeling bad for no actual reason. It was as if seeing others perfect feeds made me feel inadequate about mine. All of the things I’m not doing for my business or what’s old news, or what’s hot, and trendy.
I like trendy but it’s not for me as a business or life model. I need substance, truth and passion-I’m a Scorpio! Go Deep or Go Home. And I also think at some point in a woman’s life the shallow end of the pool feels wrong. We want more from our partners, our careers and ourselves. We get to an age where our blood stops making babies and instead cultivates wisdom. And that role model is still a minority in culture but it’s gaining ground. That’s the world I want to support and live in and make for my son.
So now I am mindful of the scrolling and the comparisons and ever mindful of the reason I’m on there. It’s almost a get in and get out model. Because if I stay awhile, it can be harmful to my mental health. All of the truly successful entrepreneurs are creating in their worlds and using social media for marketing, not comparison shopping. It goes back to the question I keep in the front of my mind: How much of the day is spent Creating vs. Consuming?
